July 30, 2005

Whats on your nightstand?!?!

Once again my blog mama-sis, Bou, tagged me with another meme, the “What’s on your bedside nightstand meme”. You would think that after some of the previous ones I’ve done she would stop doing this. She claims to like the creative way I write my responses. Personally I think she is full of crap and just likes torturing me. With this meme there is not much room for creativity, but there is room for censorship. After some debate with my wife, I decided I’m going to be brutally honest with what is on my bedside nightstand. Read on at your own risk and possible mental images you wished you never had.

1 lamp

1 cordless phone

1 Winston cup racing mug

1 Packer Barrel of Beer mug.

1 Tommy Bartlet show glass

1 Lambeau Field mug

1 Coca-Cola mug

1 Hucks Now “Do the wild thing” mug.

9 used disposable cups stacked.

2 prescription bottles filled

1 Toe Nail Clipper

Dust (I’m a bit of a slob if you haven’t realized by now)

1 bottle of Love Lickers oral sex syrup

1 tube of KY jelly

1 tube of astroglide (empty)

1 tube of O-glide (empty)

1 tube of “O” female orgasm enhancer

1 cock ring… used

1 Twistin’ Sister Dolphin Vibrator (For use on my wife)…. Used

1 pair handcuffs

I think that does it… are you disturbed yet?

As for the cups, Sally and I share a drinking problem. Except mine usually involves my bringing up what ever drink I have in my hand when I decide to go to bed, and forgetting to bring it down the next day.

Update: Apparently my wife is more disturbed that I admited to all of this.

Posted by Contagion in Annoying MEMEs at July 30, 2005 10:12 AM | TrackBack

*shaking my head*

So when you get to Fritz's, are you going to be alive still, or is Ktreva just going to dump off your carcass?

Honesty may be the best policy, but it can get you killed, too!

Posted by: That 1 Guy at July 30, 2005 12:13 PM

If I were her, no matter what the 'real circumstances' I'd have broken every one of your fingers.....then proceeded to turn some of those re-enactment toys of yours back at ya!!

You are a brave brave man Dude. Damn......

Posted by: Tammi at July 30, 2005 12:54 PM

You forgot "The Big Blue Fist"....

Posted by: Graumagus at July 30, 2005 01:46 PM

T1G: Nah, I'll be alive... she still needs me.

Tammi: My hand will be fine, she still needs it. ;)

Grau: There is no big blue fist in my house... yet.

Posted by: Contagion at July 30, 2005 01:58 PM

I'm actually no so much distubured by what's on/in the nightstand as I am by the fact that either you leave nasty used bottles of lubes laying around your house for extended periods of time, or you guys managed to completely empty two bottles in a night...
But.. hmmm.... the new girlfriend likes dolphins.. I may have just been inspired... :P

Posted by: S at July 30, 2005 02:16 PM

Contagion... I don't think she needs your hand... she has a dolphin. Just sayin'... ;-)

I'm just stunned by how many mugs are on your bedside stand. And... holy crap, does your eldest not ask questions? Wow.

Eldest: Hey, Dad, what're these for?
Contagion: Oh! Those! Well, you know, in case a bad guy breaks into the house, I can cuff him until the cops get here.

Oh yeaaaaah. ;-)

Posted by: Bou at July 30, 2005 02:33 PM

Actually his eldest would probably believe that :P

Posted by: S at July 30, 2005 02:35 PM

Used? Oh yeah, that's TMI no matter how you interpret it...

Posted by: Ogre at July 30, 2005 06:39 PM

Well, I don't know you, but what the hell........

Try the Rabbittttttttt!!

Posted by: Sinequanon at July 30, 2005 08:31 PM

The only thing that disturbs me is that "1 set handcuff keys" isn't on the list...

Posted by: Harvey at July 30, 2005 08:36 PM

As I told Contagion....It wouldn't be so bad if he hadn't used the term USED.

Harvey - the keys are on MY nightstand!

Posted by: ktreva at July 31, 2005 08:41 AM

Mom... Dad... I think I'm going to need to see that therapist we were talking about...

Posted by: virtue at July 31, 2005 09:37 PM

Ktreva: The used part does make it sound kinda icky. Kind of like a cup full of mold....eeewwww! But, it was really honest!

Contagion: Yes, the list did inspire my utmost honesty....up to a point...I never said what was 'inside' the cabinet!

I don't think there is anything wrong with sex and talking about it - we could use a little more of that in the world. I have always thought it odd that we talk, see, and read about incredibily violent acts as almost passe, but sex still embarrasses the majority of people...as if violent games are ok, but honesty about sex isn't......it just seems backward.

Enjoyed reading your list and making my own!
BTW-I can't drink worth my salt these days as I dearly pay for each and every sip over the limit and it takes 3 miserable days to recover! Not that a pending recovery period would stop me if thats what I wanted to do!

Sounds like you all had a great time!

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