December 02, 2005

It's not a vacation!

Ah my good and faithful readers, I am currently live blogging from my very own computer at home. I’m sure you are all asking yourselves, “Wait, how can that be Contagion? You work, you have minions to torture and inventory to move.” Well today I don’t. I have some “Time Off” for the day. Apparently my peers and management don’t like being called “Farking Idiots” in the middle of a staff meeting. I just don’t understand why not, they are. It’s not like I was caught lying to them by saying, “You are the most competent and able management staff I’ve ever had the privilege of working with or for.”

So I’m going to spend some time today doing stuff like…. Trimming my toe nails, catching up on blogging, trimming my finger nails, read some blogs I’ve never been to before, trimming my facial hair, doing some Christmas shopping, trimming some pubic hair and I think I’m going to travel across town to get some Taco Johns for lunch. Why? Because I can, what else am I going to do with the day? The shooting range isn’t open on Friday, plus I really don’t want to travel an hour and a half just to spend an hour shooting to drive back. I did some math, with the cost of bullets, fees and gas it usually costs me around $100.00 for an hours worth of fun. I can invest that $100.00 into alcohol and spread it out for 4 hours. MMMmm, Alcohol… I can do that!

OH! Maybe I’ll go see a movie… no, can’t do that. I refuse to be the dork that goes to movies by themselves. And before any of my readers who do that get on me, yes you are a dork for going to the movies by yourself. Find a friend for pete’s sake, I’m free today!

Heck I’m free possibly even into next week, rest of the month, could be through the beginning of next year. I think it depends on how pissed off they really were. Oh, I guess I should at least pretend to be remorseful. Wait, I just can’t. Even after getting a good 10 hours of sleep and not being pissed today, I still have no regrets. To be honest, when I return to work I think I might do it again, just in case they missed my point. These people need to realize they are farking idiots!

Well I’m off to visit the blogosphere. My IM is in the on position so if you e-mail me I’ll probably respond right away. If you don’t then you will never know the joy of having e-mail chat with someone the likes of me!

Posted by Contagion in Tales from the Work Place at December 2, 2005 09:24 AM | TrackBack

Yeah, management is kind of funny about being called out on their ineptness. I'd snapped a couple of times and realized that the only one getting screwed was me. So I took another approach.

I started going to my "bosses" with problems only they, with their infinite wisdom, could take care of. As the old saying goes, giving them just enough rope to hang themselves.

We'll see how well it's worked in exactly two weeks.

Posted by: phin at December 2, 2005 09:45 AM

Hmm, if I worked with you I'd probably be home today too, cause I would have laughed out loud at the sight of you calling them on their ineptness!

Posted by: oddybobo at December 2, 2005 09:58 AM

I can't believe that you actually snapped on them... You?

Who am I kidding? Enjoy the day!

Posted by: That 1 Guy at December 2, 2005 10:17 AM


Posted by: Jenna at December 2, 2005 11:20 AM

tee heee heee.

Posted by: vw bug at December 2, 2005 12:32 PM

good for you. i too disliked having to pretend that those who have employed me in the past were not idiots. you need to let them know where they stand once in a while. at least you didn't assault any of them, i salute your self control. i'll have a sip of scotch in your honor. enjoy the day off.

Posted by: tut the guinea at December 2, 2005 04:09 PM

I agree with oddybobo, I'd take off too if I worked in your office; just hearing your lilting voice (heh) echoing through the building -- "...f*cking idiots..." -- would've put me in traction! Enjoy the mental health day. :)

Posted by: Wes at December 2, 2005 04:31 PM

I was about to go off on another tirade about my supervisor, but, er, I'll contain myself.

Posted by: Shadoglare at December 3, 2005 12:16 AM

Just be careful man, unemployment sucks...

Posted by: Graumagus at December 3, 2005 12:59 PM


Posted by: Bou at December 3, 2005 10:30 PM