Miasmatic Review

That's just farking weird!

Oddybobo must think I’m her personal whipping boy. She is one meme away from tying Bou for tagging me the most with these things. DAMMIT, that’s two with in 3 weeks she’s hit me with! (I don't care if I did end that sentence with a preposition, I'm so mad I could spit!)Ya know, you’d think I’d done some horrible thing to her family and she’s out to get revenge. Either that or a comment I made in the past is coming back to haunt me, in a very unusual way.

I spent 30 minutes wishing her hair would fall out all at once. No permanent damage, just something that would be difficult to explain during the holidays, it could grow back in January. Then I sat down to look at what this stupid MEME is.

Five weird habits I have. Is this the top five, most common five, most embarrassing five? It doesn’t say, so I guess I just pick five of the couple of thousand strange habits I have.

A) When I’m alone I will scream out nonsense phrases at the top of my lungs while making funny faces. Yep, I’m like a tourettes plagued simpleton when I’m by myself.

2) At night I grind my teeth (not so weird); I’ve done this ever since I can remember. Every time I go to the dentist, they comment on how I’ve drastically altered the shape and density of my teeth. My molars are sharper then peoples incisors. Dentists have bent, BENT, tools on my teeth during check ups and cleaning (Not a habit, but weird). I routinely eat bones just to see other people’s reaction when I easily bite through them. (Weird habit)

D) I cannot remember the last time my fingernails have seen a trimmers. Using my ever-sharpened teeth, I will bite them off in a clean line as to look like they’ve been trimmed.

4) I have never slept for more then 5 hours straight, I always have to get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. It doesn’t matter if I go to the bathroom right before bed or quit drinking anything four hours before I go to sleep. Inevitably, every night I wake up approximately four hours into the night to go to the bathroom.

E) At night when my wife is sleeping, I’ll stare at her boobs and start to… I’m kidding, jeez people, this is not THAT kind of blog. My last final weird habit is that I like to say things purely for the shock factor of it, no matter how much trouble it brings me.

Finally, I’m supposed to tag five people. Whom to tag? I know!

Dr. Phat Tony. He’s good at making lists, plus this helps me send another link his way for all this stuff: History of Thanksgiving, History of Discovery of America, How to Join the Canadian Army and Girls Gone Wild. Apparently he’s already number one for Humpback Midget.

Bouddica: Because I owe her, and I may as well tag her before she tags me!

Barb: I don’t think I’ve every sent her any link love, and I’m not sure she wants this kind.

Chemicalnova: He’s hiding something over there.

Wes: He just needs something to put up on that blog and he’s NEVER done a meme. Consider your cherry popped BEOTCH!

Remember you have to reveal 5 "weird" habits you have and then "tag" five more unsuspecting idiots people to do it. Yea, I know. Don't blame me, blame Oddybobo. SHE tagged me!