December 15, 2005

What a nice day!

Good afternoon my good people, it warms my heart that you have taken the time to stop by and visit with me again today. I can see from some of your comments on a recent post, there is some concern for my well-being. Let me lay aside your concerns now, there is nothing conceivably wrong with me. However, I have taken some offense to terms used in my comments.

First off, my companions were not hippies. Both of them were well-groomed and clean individuals. There is no way a hippy would have worn the clothes nor carried the handbags these two had.

Secondly, I think we should refrain from using the term hippie. It symbolizes a turbulent time in history. Instead, I feel that these individuals should be referred to as the hygienically challenged.

Next, people where insinuating that I was drugged and/or under the influence of alcohol. Let me assure you that no mind altering substances where inducted into my system. In fact, I’ve decided that I’m going to cut back drastically on my drinking. I’d say quit, but I just don’t know if I could go cold turkey right now.

I’ve been discussing with Ktreva giving up re-enacting. Since it not only promotes the senseless murder of animals, the use of firearms AND subjugates women to subservient roles, I feel this is a harmful environment in which to raise my children. After the beginning of the year, I’m going to sell off all my equipment. There are plenty of re-enactors our there that would be willing to pay bottom dollar for my stuff.

I’m also going to take my firearms to be melted down. It was wrong of me to purchase that pistol recently. Ktreva was against it from the beginning and I decided to but it anyway. It was wrong of me to go against her wishes. It was also wrong of me to endanger my family by bringing firearms into the house.

The embarrassment over how blind I’ve been could just make me weep. Thankfully, the persons I’ve been talking with the last three days have enlightened me. Now I have a chance to mend my ways before it’s too late.

Thank you all for stopping by!

Posted by Contagion in Bullshite at December 15, 2005 03:55 PM | TrackBack

Oh God make it stop make it stop!
This is giving me the willies!

Posted by: Shadoglare at December 15, 2005 02:17 PM

This has all the signs of an extra early April Fool's post.

Posted by: physics geek at December 15, 2005 02:21 PM

ROTFLMAO! I haven't seen anything so well written since I had to take a 'management' class. My cheeks hurt from the laughing and smiling at this.

Posted by: vw bug at December 15, 2005 03:00 PM

Don't. Make. Me. Slap. You.

Posted by: Wes at December 15, 2005 03:25 PM

Now I am getting scared . . .

Posted by: oddybobo at December 15, 2005 04:03 PM

Dude, I know what town you live in. It's easy for me to call the mental health authorities.

Posted by: caltechgirl at December 15, 2005 04:56 PM

OMG - it's pretty deep over here! Somebody hit him with the cattle prod and shock him out of this bizarre behavior!

Posted by: Barb at December 15, 2005 08:11 PM

I think I get it. Someone from his office must be checking his website now. Or, maybe he has been convinced of the peace love and harmony that tolerating everything brings.

Posted by: littlejoe at December 15, 2005 09:54 PM

So ya wanna head over to Hooters for lunch?

Posted by: That 1 Guy at December 15, 2005 10:44 PM

Stop it, you're scaring the children!

Oh wait, this isn't some bizzare initiation ceremony into a higher level of oneness in the Dome Revolutionary Group, is it?

Posted by: Ogre at December 16, 2005 06:02 AM


Right back at ya!

Posted by: Machelle at December 16, 2005 07:55 AM

Just to help you out Contagion, I'll give you $40 for the Taurus and you can donate that money to the charity of your choice. That way, everybody wins and your tortured soul can be at peace.

Posted by: spurs at December 16, 2005 09:25 AM

Okay -- Who are you, and what have you done with my friend??? Is there ransom involved? Please, please, please... let me pay the ransom and get my real friend back.

Posted by: Omnibus Driver at December 16, 2005 10:05 AM

No paying to get him back would be way to French. The real Contagion would never want that.

Posted by: Dr. Phat Tony at December 16, 2005 11:41 AM