January 05, 2006

Boys being boys?

It seems that Boopie is having a problem on the bus. He’s being picked on. Today some kids took his hat, that he just got for Christmas, and where playing keep away with it. He never got the hat back. I’m not exactly sure what else happened as Boopie changed his story six times in ten minutes. My wife is very upset about the whole thing.

What I do know for a fact is that Boopie did not tell the bus driver about what was happening. Now, when we got home, Ktreva contacted the transportation department regarding the incident. To me this is a perfectly acceptable course of action to take. It makes the district aware, as well as the bus driver by default. The school district does have a strict no bullying policy.

My thing is originally she wanted to me to get involved by confronting the kids. Personally, I obviously have no problem doing anything like that. My issue was that we don’t know which kids were involved. The information from our son is sketchy at best. Most importantly, I feel this would just bring on more harassment later on.

I remember when I was a kid, whenever another boy’s parents got involved in a schoolyard conflict, that just made life more miserable for the boy. Heck, the worse butt kickin’ I ever received was when my mother, unbeknownst to me, got involved in an altercation between me and another kid. A couple of weeks later the other kid and some of his friends used me as a punching bag.

What do you all think? Have we done enough in contacting the school or do I knock off work early tomorrow to intercept the bus and have a “talk” with everyone on it?

Posted by Contagion in Family Life at January 5, 2006 05:03 PM | TrackBack

I wish I had an answer for you. I'll need it in a few years. The only time I had a real problem was about that age. Someone at the bus stop had a knife and came after me. I made it close to home (faster runner) and my teenage sister was outside. She beat the crap out of them. End of story. Yes, it was two kids. Don't ask me. I have no clue to this day what started it. They never bothered me before nor after.

Posted by: vw bug at January 5, 2006 06:23 PM

Dunno what my reaction as a parent would be.

As a wee lad, oh so many years ago, I utilized the best tools I had available. A sucker punch followed up by swinging a fully loaded backpack.

Knocked the little bastards two front teeth out.
Never screwed with me again.

Of course that was twenty years ago. Today, they'd probably charge someone that committed the same act with attempted murder.

You could always have him teach the other kids the capital of Thailand. A nutshot is always a very effective way to get a point across. As pops always said, there's no such thing as a fair fight.

Posted by: phin at January 5, 2006 06:40 PM

I think having a "talk" with the little bastards will eventually come to bad for Boopie. You've experienced it...

Notifying the company or school is a good start. Send him to school with a stainless steel thermos, with training on use as a club...

Posted by: Tammi at January 5, 2006 06:54 PM

naah. While I like that idea, he's more likely to get caught for retaliation.

Nail him down on details and then make him stand up for himself by telling on whoever did it.

Posted by: caltechgirl at January 5, 2006 10:04 PM

but first, make sure he didn't just lose it and is making up stories to cover his ass.

Posted by: caltechgirl at January 5, 2006 10:04 PM

Yeah, confronting them on your part is just going to bring the bullies down on him harder because he "had to have his daddy stand up for him."
Unfortunately, and saying this as someone who got picked on a lot when I was about that age, the only one who's going to be able to stand up for him is himself.
All the more reason to try to get the boy into weight training or a sport or something I guess :P

Posted by: Shadoglare at January 5, 2006 10:32 PM

I would teach him how to beat the ever loving shit out of people so he can defend himself. That being said I would also find someone a lot bigger than the others and have him hang out with boopie, that always worked for me.

Posted by: Machelle at January 6, 2006 07:29 AM

I was always the one who hung out with the smaller kids so that they wouldn't get beat on. I was, afterall, a bully in my own right, sorta. Never picked on kids, I was the revenge bully. So when the stupid boy called me a chink, he got beat up by me, when another boy picked on the little girl around the corner for stuttering, he got beat up by me! Boopie needs lessons in fisticuffs, and possibly a bigger buddy.

Posted by: oddybobo at January 6, 2006 08:52 AM

First impulse is to step in and take the boys on. Further thought says, "Bad idea", as much as it sucks. At this point it is a hat. Step in when it escalates. Save that trump card.

You started in the right place. Now your son needs some boxing lessons. Perhaps you could have him take some Martial Arts. He needs to know when to walk away and when not to and how to seriously defend himself.

And get the details pinned down. Does he have a friend on the bus you can call their parents and get more info?

Posted by: Bou at January 6, 2006 11:31 AM

I have to go with not interjecting yourself yet. I know Boopie, and I know how hard it would be to teach him to "beat the everloving snot" out of the other kids. So I say, teach him to at least go to the proper authority figure and try to take care of it. (Even though my gut says that is just going to cause more bullying also.)

Posted by: littlejoe at January 6, 2006 11:51 PM