Miasmatic Review

Scots know parties.

Have you ever been to a New Years party that is dull and boring? They suck, everything is quiet and people just set around having “gentle” conversations. That is why you need to find a Scot and go to their party. According to this article, Scottish New Year parties tend to have more incidents. Now in this article they are mainly referring to property damage, not physical damage.

” Parties in Scotland were the most accident-prone whilst those hosted in the southwest were relatively staid affairs.”

Of course they are; Brits don’t know how to have fun. It takes a Scot to have a good time! See, it’s not about breaking things; it’s about fun. When people are having a good time, they tend not to think and do things on impulse, when this happens items get broken. Sure, it’s annoying, and yes, maybe it can be expensive, but it’s fun!

” One teenage party in Bristol got so out of hand that the claim for theft and malicious damage came to 5,000 pounds, he said.”

Those crazy teenagers! That’s only about $8,626.50 American dollars, depending on when it happened. That’s a small price to pay for a party that will live on through history. I’m willing to bet the participants of this party will be talking about it until the day they die. Then their grandkids will regale their friends with the story of party.

Some of you may be saying to yourselves, “Sure there is more damage at a Scottish party, they are all boozed up.” People, that is an assumption. Sure, there is a readily available supply of good Scotch whisky, but that doesn’t mean they are all drinking it. (Yes, I said that with a straight face.) Maybe they are drinking some good Scottish beer!

Anyway, the moral of this story is: If you want to attend a good New Years party, find a Scot.