Miasmatic Review

Sweaty Betty Blonde

Yesterday at the store, Ktreva joined me on my weekly trip to pick out a beer. Normally she doesn’t come with, but after talking about how they had expanded their beer selection she wanted to see. Now my fine contaminants it should be a testimony to the expansion of the beer aisle when I say that even Ktreva was taken back by the new size and selection, almost doubled! Since she was with me, I let her pick out the beer. Well actually it was because she looked really good in her tight pants and I was really distracted. She suggested numerous beers, but she really was pushing tonight’s beer on me. The name of it made her think I should try it. So because of darling Ktreva, I will be reviewing Sweaty Betty Blonde by Boulder Beer Company of Boulder, CO. (I just want to point out that the other six-pack she bought that day was Dirty Bastard. What a combination that is.) I don’t know if she thought I’d like it, or just really wanted me to have a Sweaty Betty in my mouth. As long as Betty makes me happy, it’s all good.

We have our standard 12 oz Brown bottle. With a bright yellow label. There is an anime looking blue eyed, blonde haired girl on the front with the name of the beer in blue over it. There is a lot of information on the label about the beer, but the opening paragraph (yes paragraph) starts with, “Irresistible, flirtatious, aromatic, soft, supple, unavoidable, smooth, exuberant, glistening, wild, firm, rare, succulent, luscious, ripe, natural, glowing, curvaceous, magical, wheat… and the 5th release in our looking glass series of beers.” Well if they are describing a beer, I’m kind of worried. If they are describing a woman named Betty they know… ummm I’m not sure about the wheat part, but the rest has my attention.

It has a weak pour. There was almost no head and no lacing on the glass. What head there was faded really quickly leaving nothing at the top of the beer. Needless to say Betty doesn’t give good head. (Sorry, there went my PG rating.) It is very pale yellow in color, and there is some cloudiness to it, which is typical of wheat beers.

The aroma is an overpowering combination of wheat and yeast. There are some spice undertones, but it’s hard to discern what they are. Like the scent, the taste is mainly wheat and yeast. There is a citric accent to it, maybe lemon. Again it’s hard to get past the wheat and yeast flavor.

This is a light bodied beer. There is a crispness to it that is pleasant. The carbonation was a bit strong, but not unpleasantly so. It’s also a little on the dry side.

This isn’t a bad beer. Like most wheat beers they do tend to lack a little something. At least this wheat beer didn’t make me think of cereal while I drank it. I’m going to give this a 4.5 out of 10.