Miasmatic Review

Seeing Red.

As I pull into my driveway after work tonight, I notice a bright red note on my front door. At first I thought it was just another advertisement some local small business. Then I wondered if it was another flier from the church up the street inviting me to some Saturday neighborhood bar-b-que and sermon session. They like to do that a lot. Either way I thought it was nothing important. I own my own property (In theory) so I know it’s not an eviction notice. I’m not behind on any bills, so I know it’s not a foreclosure notice. I haven’t had any complaints from neighbors, my property is in order, and there was absolutely nothing that I could think of to make me consider it being anything more then a waste of paper.

Until I pulled it off of the door and read it:

City of Rockford
Water Division

Your water will be shut off in 5 days unless proper action is taken by you and then notify this office at ###-### accordingly due to:

No Access to Change Meter.

Previous attempts have been made to change your meter unsuccessfully

WHAT?!?!?!?!?! This is the first time I’ve heard anything about this. There has been no previous notes, no calls, no letters, no anything! How the hell am I supposed to know they are coming if they don’t tell me? Wait, maybe they figure that I’m just another leech off of the government and sit around all day collecting funds and watching my stories.

I call the number on the warning. They advise me that they want to install a new water meter on my house. They asked if I would be home tomorrow between 12:30 and 4:00PM. Sure! I just didn’t happen to be home today, or the other times they came, because I was out playing golf. Hell no, I have a job. You know, that thing that people do in order to pay their water bills. They wanted to know when in the next 5 days I would be home. Well that would be tomorrow night AFTER 4:30PM. Oh no, that won’t work; it’s after their business hours.

They need to get in and get this done; it’s long over due they tell me. I explain to the City of Rockford Water Division girl, who although very nice and polite doesn’t seem to have a full grasp that people beside her work between the hours of 8:00 AM and 4:00PM, that I work during the times they want, and I just can’t magically take the day off tomorrow with out notice and I’m going to be busy over the weekend. “Oh no! We don’t work on the weekend either, it has to be during the week.”

Fortunately I had Monday off already as a recovery day, so I was able to get an appointment that day. I just wish they would tell me this stuff in advance instead of leaving a bright red scary notice on the door.